Writing Prompts - 30 Days of D/s

30 Days of D/s – Day 13 (How Do You Feel About Pain?)

Loving BDSM’s 30 Days of D/s – Day 13 (How Do You Feel About Pain?)

Let us be clear, in D/s, pain isn’t a requirement. You don’t have to be a masochist or a sadist to be D/s. But it’s always good to have an idea of where you stand on the subject.

As a submissive, would you consent to a painful spanking as punishment? As a Dominant, do you want to inflict pain on your submissive? Does the idea of it turn you on or off?

There are no right answers with this one, but because it’s so common, it’s worth thinking about.

I will ALWAYS tell you that I am NOT a pain slut….the idea of being hit with a closed fist or whipped to the point where it opens my skin and I’m bleeding…no, that is not something that I would consent to.  It’s a hard limit for me.

However, I can’t deny that I am aroused by the feeling of a bare hand warming my bottom.  The way it feels to feel his bare hand connecting to my bottom, skin growing pinker and hits getting stronger to the point where your breathe catches and “ouch” comes out….not stop or quit because you don’t want it to end.  This type of pain makes me wet and achy and crave to be touched and used sexually.

When I first came to the lifestyle and would watch CSM yielding a whip or flogger I would get aroused by the sight but was TERRIFIED at the thought of them hitting my skin.  No matter how much he would try to explain the relation of pain in play….I could not get past it.  I just saw it as something that “would be” painful and avoided it.  However, as I’ve attended events and made friends I can see the error in my thinking.

As I’ve explored and learned, I’ve found that pain does arouse me and make me wet.  Not closed fist hitting, drawing blood whipping but the warming of skin and slow increase of pain to where your brain stops THINKING and you are floating on a wave of pleasure.

However, I’ve also found that having my mental boundaries pushed causes the same connection and effect for me as well….which is something that I am hoping to explore more of.

As before, I invite you to share your thoughts below or to visit the Loving BDSM website and join the 30 Days of D/s journey


3 thoughts on “30 Days of D/s – Day 13 (How Do You Feel About Pain?)

  1. Wonderful post, Selina! I would never consent to closed fist hitting or anything that would draw blood either, just not my style. But, as you described, pain is arousing for me. I’m not sure if it is the actual pain (as during a spanking I just want it to stop) or more, the act of being dominated by my Husband.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Other than a type of impact play that feels like a massage (with a closed fist) most closed fit strikes and drawn blood count more as edge play than anything else to me, and I’m too much of a scaredy cat for most edge play, lol. I have found that I’m a definitely masochist and love a certain amount of pain but not ALL pain. I prefer deep, thudding pains over sharp stings. Exploring pain (for those who are interested) is about finding the types that work for you and rejecting the rest. That being said, my submissive side allows me to experience pain I don’t love (like the cane or something really stinging) to please JB because I know he likes it. I can’t/won’t take much of it, but from time to time, it’s not so much about the pain but more about the submission I’m offering him.

    Liked by 1 person

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